Eleven years ago, the Supreme Court decision on Obergefell fundamentally altered God’s design for marriage. We were told that everyone needed to love, affirm, and celebrate this “societal advancement”, that when same-sex couples wanted children it was “reasonable”. But a recent study now overwhelmingly shows that defending God’s design for marriage to be between one man and one woman is not a fringe position. Nearly ALL, 96%, of conservative and moderate voters agree it’s important for a child to be raised with both an involved mother and father.

On the 11th anniversary of the Obergefell decision, the Greater Than Coalition, led by Katy Faust, released a study – and every statistic proved what we’ve been saying for over 11 years – this is harming children.

Deliberately Denying a Mother or Father

The concept that no child should be deliberately denied a mother or father was agreed on by 82% of those surveyed. That completely dismantles the concept of same-sex adoption or surrogacy, where in both cases a child is deliberately denied a mother or father.

A few months ago, a video went viral that was posted by a same-sex attracted man and his partner after they adopted a baby boy. The baby was seen crying for its mom, as can be heard from the video. The response the two dads had was heartbreaking – they laughed at the baby, making fun of it for wanting its mom when its options were “Dada or Pop”. 

Unfortunately, this kind of thing is happening to children all across the country, as same-sex couples are using methods like adoption and surrogacy to place their adult desires above the needs of children to have BOTH a mother and a father. 

Children’s Needs Before Adult Desires

Again, a decisive majority has it, as 78% of conservative and moderate voters agreed that children’s needs should come before adult desires. Same-sex couples that desire children have to go out of the bounds of biology for that to happen. Children deserve homes where they will be loved the way God intended- by a man and a woman. 

Donor-conceived children feel the pain of missing a mom or a dad. One writes, 

“I have two moms and am constantly wondering what it would be like to have a father and who my biological dad is. I’m wondering is there any way to find who he is? I’m not expecting him to jump and be some sort of active dad to me I just want to know who he is…”

Adoption: Same-Sex vs. God’s Way

The claim that “being raised by same-sex parents is no different for a child than being raised by an adoptive mother and father” was also rejected outright by 66% of conservative and moderate voters. Mothers and fathers each play unique roles in a child’s life. A father’s hard work and leadership does not replace a mother’s compassion and nurturing, and vice versa. The two are designed to compliment each other, and a child needs and deserves both! 

Samantha Weissing was raised by two dads. She wrote, 

“For the first eight years of my life, I was raised by two gay men — my father and his partner. My formative years were almost entirely devoid of women. I didn’t even know that there was such a thing as a mother until I watched “The Land Before Time” at school. My 5-year-old brain could not understand why I didn’t have the mom that I suddenly desperately wanted. I felt the loss. I felt the hole. As I grew, I tried to fill that hole with aunts, my dads’ lesbian friends and teachers. I remember asking my first grade teacher if I could call her mom. I asked that question of any woman who showed me any amount of love and affection. It was instinctive. I craved a mother’s love even though I was well-loved by my two gay dads.”

The Work Continues…

These polling results serve as an encouragement to those of us who recognize that God’s design for family leads to true human flourishing, but they will not automatically result in cultural change. We must individually take up the cause of advocating for children and their rights, and point culture back to the basics – the importance of the nuclear family and the ways that it protects the rights of children.

We must tell their stories.

Our nation has been “getting it wrong” for long enough that the victims of our mistakes are old enough to tell their stories. We must amplify their voices and show a watching world the importance of placing the needs of children over the desires of adults.